Your child is likely starting to think and talk about what he or she wants to be or do when they grow up. Young people who have goals and dreams for their futures do better in school and are more likely to stay out of trouble. Sometimes their dreams may seem pretty unrealistic, and it’s tempting to point this out (e.g., “What’s the likelihood of your becoming a professional baseball player?”). This can feel discouraging and can undermine their motivation to take action toward achieving their goals. We want our children to believe they can get ahead in life and pursue their dreams.

• Try to help them see what they may need to do to reach their goals. 
  
  Ask:
  • What skills will you need?
  • Where can you learn these skills? Are there special classes, books, or other resources you can explore to learn more about this?
  • Will you need to go to college? To study what?
  • Is there someone you can talk to who could give you more information?
  • Could you volunteer somewhere to find out if you really like it or not?

 

• If you’re not sure about your child’s goals or dreams, use today’s homework activity as an opportunity to begin a conversation about their future. Ask questions:
  • What kind of family do you want when you grow up?
  • Tell me about what kind of job you would like.
  • What could you do no to help reach this goal?
  • What do you want to do in your free time?

 

Remember that supporting goals and dreams at this stage of development requires listening and encouragement more than realism. Helping them explore the possibilities communicates to them that you believe they are competent and capable of achieving success in life. It takes action to move forward in the pursuit one’s dreams, and your encouragement of this kind of exploration reinforces one of the most import skills your child will need to achieve the future they want for themselves.